Induced Lactation and Co-Lactation
I’ve had the privilege of supporting many queer families as they grow their families through birth, adoption, and surrogacy. When a non-birthing parent induces lactation, some families choose to share the feeding role. You might hear this called co-lactation, co-breastfeeding, co-nursing, or co-feeding.
It can be a really meaningful way to share both the responsibility and the connection that comes with feeding your baby.
A quick note on language
Language matters. In my practice, I aim to use inclusive, affirming language for all parents. You’ll often see me use “parent” rather than “mother,” and terms like “breast” or “breastfeeding” based on medical terminology deeming breasts as both a female and male body part.
That said, what matters most is your language. I always follow your lead and utilize the words that feel right for you and your family.
What co-lactation can look like
Co-lactation is about finding a rhythm that works for both parents and your baby. It also means balancing milk production, expectations, and each person’s experience.
There’s no one right way to do this, but here are some things we’ll think through together:
When you’d like to begin co-lactating (right after birth, once milk comes in, or later on)
How you want to share feedings day to day
What feels equitable and supportive for both of you
What matters most to each of you in this experience
It’s also important to talk openly about expectations.
In most cases, the birthing parent will produce more milk than the parent inducing lactation. That’s normal, and we can plan around it.
We’ll also talk through how you might feel if your baby shows a preference for one parent at times, which can happen for many different reasons, including milk flow.
The goal is to create a plan that feels supportive, realistic, and connected for everyone involved.
You don’t have to figure this out alone
If you’re thinking about induced lactation or co-lactation, I’m here to support you. You can schedule a free 15-minute Meet & Greet to talk through your goals and options.
And when you’re ready for more in depth support, journey packages are available.